Sunday, 22 February 2015

John Prescott set to return to front-line boxing

John Prescott is returning to his front-line boxing career as an unpaid adviser to Carl "the cobra" Froch, with responsibility for upper cuts. 

The former street fighter and deputy PM will focus on trying to help knock heads together, even though that's still an illegal move in British boxing. 

Former colleague and Prime Minister, Tony Blair said: "My old mate John is a formidable fighter. His fists are weapons of mass destruction and I fully believe they can be deployed within 15 minutes. He will be a great addition to Froch's team". 

Prescott isn't the only politician to be returning to fighting. Lord Paddy Ashdown only killed two members of his shadow cabinet with his bare hands and was appointed as a new WWE wrestler in January. 

In other news:

Man survives after 200 ft fall from grace

Europe will bail out Grease but says Grease 2 is "beyond help"

Sleeve tattoos causing a dip in the market for sleeve manufacturers 

Weather: Continuing weasel words until a high pressure situation leads to tautology. Outlooks for the next week - jargon.